In his paper on "Mourning and Melancholia," Sigmund Freud explores the concepts of grief and depression. Freud argues that mourning, or the natural grieving process after the loss of a loved one, involves a separation between the ego and the lost object. This describes a gradual response to the reality of the loss, rather than a timetable for forgetting the person. However, in the case of melancholia, the individual identifies with the lost object, and conflict with that object can become a severe attack on the self. Freud's paper suggests that mourning is a healthy and necessary process for healing after loss, and that therapy can help individuals struggling with melancholia to work through their unresolved grief. Overall, "Mourning and Melancholia" contributes significantly to our understanding of grief and depression and remains a widely studied and influential work in the field of psychology.
Freud’s account of self-reproach in Mourning and Melancholia also anticipates questions he later develops through the concept of the superego in The Ego and the Id. The two texts belong to different moments in his thinking. (Freud, 1917; 1923)
According to Freud, mourning is a natural and normal process that occurs when we experience the loss of a loved one. In contrast, melancholia is a distinct configuration of loss and identification that can occur when we experience a more abstract or intangible loss, such as the loss of a relationship or even the loss of our own identity. The lost relationship can become entangled with a profound sense of sadness, guilt, and despair.
Mourning can involve internalizing aspects of a person we have lost, including their values and the place their recognition held in our lives. This does not simply strengthen an internal moral compass. It may also expose the impossible standards by which we have learned to judge ourselves. (Freud, 1917; 1923)
When internal judgment becomes harsh, guilt and self-loathing may gather around not living up to the standards associated with the lost person. Some guilt concerns actual responsibility; some is organized around an image of the person we believe we should have been. Exploring that difference matters.
In conclusion, Freud's Mourning and Melancholia provides a valuable framework for understanding the connection between the process of mourning, the development of the superego, and mental health. The work is not to become a better mourner, but to hear more of the relationship, including the ambivalence that self-reproach can conceal.
Freud, S. (1917). Mourning and Melancholia. Standard Edition, 14, 237–258.
Freud, S. (1923). The Ego and the Id. Standard Edition, 19, 1–66.
Freud, S. (1914). On Narcissism: An Introduction. Standard Edition, 14, 67–102.